hi guys i thought i would write this blog as I have recently been experiencing high anxiety and depression due to my illness. At times i feel as through i have no one to talk when i am anxious and this in turn makes me feel extremely depressed. I have recently came across two really good websites that are helping me come to terms with and manage my issues.
The first websites is called https://turn2me.org/ i think this website is fantastic as every week night it offers free group online chats with a therapist and 9 other people regarding issues such as bereavement, anxiety and depression. You have to book on the group and there are limited places but i find it so refreshing to talk to people who you dont know and will not judge you. There is also the opportunity to have one 2 ones online counseling with a therapies but i have to add that this is not free is is £25.00 for 90 mins.
The second website is called https://moodgym.anu.edu.au/registered/login. This website is like a free online course to help deal with issues such as low confidence and anxiety amongest other. This course reminds me off my CBT class but with out the therapies, i cannot recommend this website enough.
As mentioned in a previous blog i am at the moment taking part in CBT in order to help with my anxiety. Since taking it i have realized how badly being effected with POTS and AF has effected me. I feel at times people dont realize how much it effects you, and how over night your life is changed and you have to adjust to becoming a new person. I will honestly admit that i have found this really hard and it has made me depressed i am trying really hard to dig my self out of the depression and start a new journey in my life.
I realize in my self that there are issues that i have not dealt with for example my dad dying at such a young age and i believe that this has greatly impacted on my Anxiety as i am scared i will have the same fate as my dad. My first god child also died of cot death as a baby and i am only now coming to terms with the fact that she is not here and the pain my best friend goes through every day . Actually my best friend Zoe give me strength and shows me that things will be better. Since the death of her daughter she has gone to university and made a success of her life, she has given a beautiful god son who i adore. And while she was doing all these amazing things she was grieving for her daughter. I am so proud of her and i hope that in time i will be able to be like her and make the best out of a bad situation. With time i hope that with the help of these website and talking to people about how i feel i will stop these negative thoughts and try and be the Tamara that my friends love.
i heard this really good quote today that my teacher put up in the end of my class and i just wanted to share it with you guys
yesterday is History, Tomorrow a Mystery, Today is a Gift, Thats why it's called the Present"
Tuesday 8 October 2013
Thursday 3 October 2013
feeling kinda rough
Hi guys I thought I would write this blog to take my mind of
the way I am feeling. I have been having a really rough couple of days, yesterday
my sister found a new place to move into meaning that I will be home alone. I
have not lived on my own since I was diagnosed and it is starting to make me
really anxious and worried.
Today I have had a really bad pots day and my friend was
like you like fine, I felt like screaming just because I like look fine, I’m
not, inside I feel like an emotional wreck. It really annoys me when people say
that, just because I look fine does not mean I am ok at times it makes me feel
like people think I am lying about feeling ill.
And to top it all off I started getting sharp chest pain on
the bus I literally thought I was going to have a heart attack it was so scary,
I have had chest pains before but not like that. So I called my doctor and he
said he thinks they are called Precordial Catch Syndrome. I literally didn't know
what this was so I found a good email site which I will post below and found
that they are harmless and do make you feel like you are having a heart attack
which is really scary.
I am also feeling really anxious since come of the citalopram
and am debating being but back on them. I believe that the anxiety is coming
from the fact that I will be living alone and it’s a really scary situation for
me. If anyone has any advice on living
alone any tips would great.
I also found a really good you tube video posted by a team
of cardiologist about AF and they do discuss other issues. I think you guys
would find it helpful
Sorry about my rant I just feel at times I can only express myself
through my blog
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